So it turns out that when I say tomorrow what I actually mean is over a week later HA! Sorry dudes and dudettes for my delay with this post. So for those of you who’ve read previous posts, you saw I spoke about the who-am-I complex which is basically when you don’t believe you’re good enough for something or anything. I wrote about the causes of this complex; self-doubt and fear. Now I am going to talk about the solutions to this complex, note that I’m writing out of experience these are things I actually have to practice everyday so here they are two solutions I know work are: belief and intelligent thinking.
If you suffer with self-doubt you have to do the opposite which is believing, trusting. Everyone has doubts, at various times in life. Doubts is something that is common to all. But not everyone allows these doubts to determine how they will live their lives. Every time you go to do something to achieve a goal you will hear two voices; the one telling you to go for it and one saying no your going to fail. Now sometimes the voice telling you no is a actually the voice you should listen to e.g. when you’re about to do something wrong, but most of the time the voice that says no is the voice you have to ignore. You have to ignore the voice of doubts otherwise it will ruin your life. If you have doubts that noone cares for you what should you do? List all the people who know and love you if you can’t think of anyone then think like this I love me I care about me, and one day I’ll find someone who will love me. Once youve done this you have to believe in this positive thought. How do you show you believe in something!? When you act on that believe, after you decide to believe in something do something that will confirm your belief. If you’ve decided to believe that you’re an important being on this earth then everyday do something that will show your belief, take care of yourself, treat yourselg, value yourself but setting principles for you and move forward. Then you will see that those doubts that used to plague you will not have much affect on you because you don’t believe in them anymore.
One of the things fear does is freeze you. Have you seen someone when their absolutely terrified? They freeze, eyes wide open, jaw dropped perfectly still. Why? Because their mind is frozen the mind is so scared it literally cannot think its frozen so it can’t send messages to the rest of the body. When your mind is stuck you are stuck. If you can’t think then you can’t do which means you can’t live. So many people are afraid and stuck even though they don’t feel afraid. Some are stuck in a job they hate because their too afraid to be rejected and not find another job. Of course this is a valid fear and its happened to many people and could happen to you but what if you do find a job right away? Why stay in a situation you hate because of the fear that something may or may not happen? One of the ways to combat fears is the use of intelligent thought, when you are faced with a situation that makes you afraid instead of giving into that feeling fear, step out of the situation a look at it logically. For example; lets say you’re afraid of letting go of a relationship/friendship because you’re afraid to be alone, the fear will tell you that you can’t let go of this relationship because you may not find someone else, there’s no-one around you like and that you should be happy to even be in a relationship. If you look at this situation judging it with intelligence you will see this is a whole load of baloney. Your intelligence will tell you
how is it in a world of over 7 billion people I won’t find someone to be a in a loving committed relationship with that will be better than the one I’m in right now?
. Do you see my point? When fear comes one of the most effective ways to combat it is by changing your thought process, if you see your mind going down that dark spiral of fear thinking who-am-I? Change your thoughts to hold up: why-not-me? Remember this: as a man thinks so he is.
So there it is my solutions on how combat the who-am-I complex that I go through and you may be going through as well. Now I’ve written this post I’m going to start practising it (because mama didn’t raise no hypocrite!) I want to invite you if you see that this complex has been a part of your life to do the same and let me know if this has helped you in any way. 🙂